Column: Good idea: go to bed, make millions

I need more money.

I’m guessing you probably need more money, too.

Bills have to be paid. Food has to be bought. And while always having exact change may be priceless, according to a recent MasterCard commercial, owing MasterCard more money than you can pay off at one time is not priceless. At all.

What I need is a million dollars.

What you probably need is a million dollars.

What 21-year-old Alex Tex has is a million dollars. And the student from a small town in England got it in four months. By selling pixels on the Internet.

Now, I had to look this up, but it turns out that pixels aren’t related to pixies. Pixels are just bits of an image on a television screen or computer monitor. Which means that Mr. Tew was not, in fact, dealing in illegal fairies. He was selling computer inches. Frankly, making a million dollars by selling pixies on eBay would have made more sense.

Mr. Tew sold space on his Web site,, at $1 a pixel. It seems that pixels are incredibly tiny, though, so to buy enough space to make an advertisement visible could cost anywhere from $100 to $1,000.

However, England being the land of crumpets, Austin Powers and plenty, thousands of businesses lined up to buy Mr. Tew’s computer inches. And, in just four months, he was a millionaire.

Now if some British 21-year-old could make a million dollars in four months, surely I could do the same.

All it takes it just one original idea. Mr. Tew came up with his idea while lying down on his bed, brainstorming ways to buy more cricket paddles or whatever it is English lads buy these days.

I have a bed. I can lie down. I can brainstorm. I’m not British, but I’m pretty sure my step-great grandmother is. That has to count for something.

So I suppose I should just go lie down on my bed and wait for brilliance to strike. But there’s one little problem with that. Unlike British 21-year-olds, I FALL ASLEEP when I lie down in bed.

It turns out I don’t need money after all.

I need a cup of coffee before I go to bed.


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